Archive for the ‘Monthly Letters’ Category

Dear Asher,

I think you’ve learned more this past month than you have in all the previous months combined! So much has happened that I don’t quite know where to begin…

Congrats little man, you now have 2 sharp fangs to go with your 10 razor-like talons… I’m going to start calling you Wolverine. Your first two teeth snuck in unbeknownst to your mother and me. The other day I was feeding you some yummy banana when you inadvertently munched down on my poor finger… I recoiled in pain as I withdrew the bloody stump that used to be my pointer. You literally drew blood. We had no idea you already had teeth because the sneaky little bastards were hiding under your tongue. The two tiny protrusions from your bottom gum are impossible to get pictures of and only make rare appearances when you are poised to eat… They don’t seem to bother you all that much, which is good because I’ve heard some teething horror stories from some other parents and I was NOT looking forward to that particular part of your baby-hood.

You are one tough kid. Unfortunately you’re also incredibly clumsy (you get that from your mother, right?). We can prop you up against stuff and you’ll happily stand there holding on for dear life. The problem is that you haven’t quite figured out how to stand up or sit back down on your own. So, once you get tired of standing, you simply let go and fall, as if the world was made of pillows and cotton candy. Every day I wonder how long it’s going to take you to realize that our living room floor is CONCRETE. You’ve had a few graceful falls on the carpet, resulting in some minor bumps and bruises, but luckily nothing too serious. I guess that’s to be expected from a future hockey player… I can hear it now, “Stitch me up and get me back in the game!!”

Chinese Acrobat?

It only took a single day, with much help from some shiny car keys, for you to learn how to crawl. It started out as an arms-only army style crawl and has since morphed into a warp-speed (he’s gone plaid!) baby crawl. You only have two gears: stopped and full speed. When you spot something across the room that you want, there’s no stopping you. Walls, chairs, pillows, couches, daddy… these obstacles are no match for your superb crawling prowess. Learning to crawl has opened up a whole new world, and although it’s much easier now to keep you entertained, I was totally unprepared for your mobility. We realized fairly quickly that we needed to baby-proof the house because your favorite activity is to play with the electrical outlets in every room of the house. When we put those little plastic covers on all the plugs, you just saw that as a new game to play and ripped them out one by one. We don’t need baby proofing, we need Asher proofing…

Speaking of Asher-proofing, I apparently need to Asher-proof my toes. You’ve been rolling around in the kitchen in one of those Fred Flintstone type baby walkers. You know, the kind that you sit in with your feet touching the ground, and the big rack of brontosaurus ribs attached to the side that always tips you over… (I wonder if you’ll ever understand that joke. Are old Flintstones episodes even shown on TV anymore? Oh well, there’s always YouTube I guess) Your favorite activity while you’re in this walker is to wait until I’m not paying attention to you, then charge at me like a bull, ramming the plastic edge of the walker into my poor unsuspecting toes. Ouch! I’d ban you from the walker, but I have too much fun watching you chase Zoe around… she’s been torturing me for the last 4 years and now it’s time for some serious payback, Asher style.

The Mighty Toe-Killer

There was also some big news this month that will have a major impact on the next 30 years of your life. On March 13 2007, Mario Lemieux and the Pittsburgh Penguins announced they had reached an agreement with the city of Pittsburgh to build a new arena that will keep the team in the city for next 30 years! I couldn’t bear the thought of you growing up without the Pens, and now you don’t have to…

Love,
Papa

Dear Asher,

February flew bye… At this rate you’ll be all grown up by May. You had a great month of firsts! Your first vacation, first time in an airplane, first taste of real food, first (and last) visit to the Igloo in Pittsburgh, and many, many more.

One of my favorite stand-up comedians of all time is Bill Cosby. My dad (your Paw-Paw) introduced me to his comic stylings a loooong time ago, and I will do the same for you. Once you’re a little older, the 3 of us will sit down together and watch Cosby ‘Himself’. Anyhoo, there’s a part in there were Cosby talks about a little 4 year old kid he sat in front of on an airplane. The kid drove him absolutely nuts the entire flight. Incidentally, the little kid’s name was ‘Jeffry’ – just like your old man. For some reason, that story about a kid wreaking havoc on an airplane has stuck with me over the years. Whenever I see a kid getting on an airplane, I pray to the airport gods that I get a seat as far away from the little bastard as possible. So, when you came along, I knew the day would come when I’d be THAT parent with a crazy, wheels-off kid incessantly kicking the seat of the generic Joe Businessman sitting in front of us.

I couldn’t have been more wrong. You were a total angel on both the flight to Pittsburgh and the flight home. You were so great that we even got several compliments from the people sitting around us while de-boarding. Thanks for not being a little ‘Jeffry’.

The trip to the ‘Burgh was awesome. Not only was it your first trip there (one of many I hope), but it was the first time for your mom too! Your Uncle Ryan drove us around your Me-Maw’s old neighborhood near Riverview Park. We saw the house she grew up in and the church Me-Maw and Paw-Paw got married at.

The best part of the trip was taking you and your mom to see the Penguins play at Mellon Arena. The team might not be in Pittsburgh next year, so it was important to me that you got to see them play in Pittsburgh (just in case, God forbid, they move to Kansas City). Hopefully that won’t ever happen and we’ll get to go to a lot of Penguin games in a new arena! The Pens beat the Capitals 3-2 – Malkin scored an unbelievable goal on a one-timer from Gonchar in the corner. It was a dream come true to get to share such a great experience with you and your mom.

This month you started eating real food. Well, I don’t know if I’d call it “real” food, but compared to the mom-juice-only diet you’ve had so far, I guess pea-mush is as real as it gets. You’ll eat anything you can get in your mouth – sweet potatoes, peas, rice cereal, green beans, bananas, carrots, earrings, loose change… and your facial expressions are priceless. Thankfully you’re not too terribly messy… yet. I’m still waiting for the day when you discover your pitching arm, I just hope we’re not serving mac & cheese.

You’ve also nailed the whole sitting up and rolling over thing. It’s funny to me how excited moms and dads get with their kids when they learn to roll over and sit up. It’s never good when you have to clarify that you’re talking about your baby and not your dog…

You’re learning new and exciting things each day! I can’t wait to see all the stuff you’ll learn to do over the next couple of months.

Love,
Papa

Dear Asher,

Today is your half-birthday. So, happy half-birthday… It’s just like your real birthday, only half as happy… right? Whatever. You are now 27 inches long and 16lbs 12oz.

The past month has been absolutely crazy. Not only have you been learning new things every day, you’ve also become quite the social butterfly. Your mom and I litterally dragged you from one end of Dallas to the other. You are now a true road warrior. It seems like we have places to go and people to see every single night.

Ignoring our better judgment, we took you down to the American Airlines Center for the NHL All-Star Saturday festivities. It was a bastard of a day… cold, rainy, windy… Perfect weather for a game of celebrity street hockey? Not so much, but we did get to see some celebrities and take some cool photos. Plus, we got to see first hand that NFL tight-ends, such as Jason Whitten, totally suck at hockey.

The next day we took you back downtown, or rather uptown, to hang out with your favorite uncle Wes (and yes, even if you did have more than one uncle, I’m sure he’d still be your favorite). Then, later that same week we went back downtown to the Dallas Museum of Art where our friend, and amazing guitarist extraordinaire, Rhett Butler kicked out the J-A-M-Z. Through it all, you never fussed or cried at all. You continue to amaze me with your ability to make people notice you (in a good way). You were all smiles. You are a professional baby. You are to babies what Sidney Crosby is to the Pittsburgh Penguins. If there was a baby league, you would be the MVP. No contest.

Nice ears

I’ll never forget the night of Friday, January 6th. We took you to your very first NHL Hockey game, the Pittsburgh Penguins vs the Dallas Stars at the American Airlines Center, and it…. was…. AWESOME! Mark Recchi scored his 500th career goal and the Pens won in a shootout. Please don’t be too upset with me, but I broke one of my own commandments. When you were born, I vowed to NEVER dress you up in animal outfits/costumes, or in hoodies or hats that have ears and/or noses/beaks (excluding Halloween of course). Well, we threw that rule out the window and dressed you up in a little penguin costume for the game. It’s black and white striped with a hoodie that has pointy ears and a beak, not to mention little webbed fee… Once we got to the arena, it was like you were Michael Jackson in a crowd of trashy Europeans. Tons of fellow Pens fans mobbed us as everybody wanted to stop and say hi to you. You had true celebrity status. I can’t believe we didn’t make it on the jumbotron (bimbotron?). I recorded the game on TV and burned it to DVD. I can’t wait to watch it with you when you’re older.

I am on a mission to make sure that your first word will be DaDa. I repeat it constantly while I’m near you, over and over and over… DaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDaDa… Then really slowly Daaaaa-Daaaaa. You actually said it the other day, but I think it was just a coincidence because I couldn’t get you to repeat it and you haven’t said it since. We’ve also decided to start teaching you some sign language. Oddly enough the sign for Daddy is the right thumb on the forehead with 4 fingers extended upwards while saying nany-nany-poo-poo. Go figure.

Love,
Papa

Dear Asher,

Every month when I sit down to write your monthly letter I have the same terrifying feeling… When you were turning two months old, I talked myself into believing that you were the cutest, happiest, most fun baby in the whole wide world. I didn’t think you could possibly get any better. Then, the second month came and went, and to my surprise, you got even cuter, happier, and more fun! Month after month I find myself wishing and hoping that I can somehow freeze time so you will stay just like you are forever…. This month was no different.

I’ll admit that I don’t exactly have a wealth of knowledge or hoard of experience when it comes to babies, but I can’t help but assume that you are, in fact, THE happiest baby in the history of the world. Ever. Period. Before you were born, happiness is not something I generally associated with babies. I knew that babies could (on rare occasions) make adults insanely happy, but for some reason I had never considered the fact that babies themselves could be happy. I’ve never seen anyone smile as much as you do and that is my favorite thing about being your dad! My nickname for you over the past couple of months has been Mr. Smiles. No matter what else is going on in my life, no matter how stressed out, tired, gloomy or grumpy I may be, your little smile ALWAYS makes me feel better.

We celebrated our first Christmas together as a family. On Christmas Eve we drove out to Mount Pleasant with Gramma and Grandpa to spend time with your Uncle Wes, great aunts Jan and Julie, and your great uncle Charlie. Then, on Christmas morning we went over to MeeMaw and PawPaw’s house to open presents and watch the Cowboys beat up on Tampa Bay. When it came time to open presents, I must confess, I was a little jealous of the all the gifts you and your cousin Ally got. Every Christmas is the same old story… we all promise not to go overboard on gifts for each other and the kids, but come Christmas morning, there are always 4,917,532 presents under the tree. I swear we could have gift wrapped the entire house with all the wrapping paper we used. In hindsight, we should have just given you shiny wrapping paper because you were far more interested in it than in your actual gifts. I can’t wait till next year’s Christmas!

You are finally sleeping through the night in your crib in your own room. This little experiment has been a challenge for your mother and a blessing for me. When I say that you’re sleeping through the night, what I really mean is that I am sleeping through the night… I am a notoriously light sleeper (which is going to suck for you as a teenager – haha), so when you were sleeping in our bedroom I didn’t get a whole lot of uninterrupted sleep. I really can’t complain about sleep because your mother has gone for 5 months now without more than 6 continuous hours of sleep. She is the amazing bionic no-sleep-needing mommy. Your saint of a mother now sleeps with a monitor right by her head and quietly gets up 2 or 3 times a night to sooth or feed you while I’m off in dreamland. On the weekends, I try to get up before her and hang out with you so she can grab a couple extra hours of shuteye. Those mornings when I get to wake you up are the best!

Ready for your close-up

No Paparazzi Please

Speaking of your mother and all of her saintliness, she made a HUGE sacrifice for you this month… she gave up eating anything from the dairy food-group. You’d been having all sorts of stomach issues, and we had tried everything imaginable to make it stop. Icky tasting medicines, bicycle legs, super-secret yoga-like burping techniques, warm blankets, belly rubs, and even The Force. Nothing seemed to help. So, just for grins, your mom decided to try a dairy-free diet for a day or two to see if that had any effect on you, and much to her horror, it did. How crazy is it that eating or drinking dairy products taints your mom’s breast-milk? It just doesn’t make any sense. I hope you appreciate the enormity of this sacrifice and how great your mom is for doing it. I gotta be honest, I love you lots but I don’t think I could do it. I looooove me some milk and I loooooove me some cheese.

I don’t remember what day it was exactly, but it is a day that will forever live in infamy… the day you discovered your voice. Up until that day, all your little noises (cries and all) were like little trumpets of joy in my ears. Then, out of the blue, you grew a police-siren in your throat. Thankfully you don’t use it very often, but when you do, holy crapola are you loud. You’ve also somehow learned to speak Cantonese. You will lie on your playmat for hours just talking to yourself in Cantonese as if you were ordering takeout… I only know what Cantonese sounds like from the Wayne’s World movies, but I’m pretty sure that’s what it is. Zang!

Love,
Papa

Dear Asher,

You are now officially 4 months old. Your Mee-Maw and Paw-Paw always told me that time would start to fly by once I had kids. Since you were born, I’ve come to realize that they were 100% right. On the day you were born, someone hit the fast-forward button on my internal TiVo… time is whizzing by so fast it’s hard for me to comprehend. You are growing so fast! It seems like only yesterday that we were bringing you home from the hospital and dressing you up in little baby clothes that were wayyyyy too big for you (you were so tiny!). Now, you’ve grown out of all those clothes that were once too big… I still can’t believe it. We took you to the doctor for your 4 month checkup yesterday and you are now 15 ½ lbs and 25 ¾ inches long. The doctor predicts that one day you will be big enough to whoop my ass, I’m just hoping it’s not until you’re at least 8.

The best thing about the past month has been the progress you’ve made on your mission to laugh. Each day you get closer and closer to letting loose with a belly-jiggling, Tapp-worthy laugh! You’re not quite there yet, but you’re, oh, so close… Your mom and I have spent hours upon hours acting like idiots, desperately trying to elicit laughter from your chubby cheeks. Every time you smile, chuckle, or squeal with joy, it’s like a giant ray of sunshine warming our hearts (and melting our stress). It truly is the best feeling in the world. Thank you for that.

Every night you have the same bedtime routine and it has become my favorite part of the day. We lay you down on our bed and read you some nighttime stories, always ending with the very confusing tale, Goodnight Moon. It’s about a bunny rabbit that lives in a house and says goodnight to all the objects in his/her view, including a cow, a bowl of mush, and a creepy old bunny-lady sitting in a rocking chair. What are these children’s book authors smoking? After reading Goodnight Moon, your mom wraps you up in your little straight jacket swaddle while I play some smooth guitar until your eyes get that glassy/sleepy stare. Then it’s off to dreamland.

Already reading at 4 months!

Saturday and Sunday mornings this past month have been extra awesome because I get to be home for what I’ve deemed “morning smile time.” You are at your happiest when you wake up in the morning, wriggling and cooing with discovery as if everything you see is totally new to you. I wish I could hear your inner monologue, but I imagine it’s something like this:

Oh look, there’s that lady that feeds me. I love her a lot (big smile). I’m hungry (big smile). There’s that dude that makes stupid faces at me ALL the time. He’s ugly, but funny (big smile). There’s that really hairy black thing that walks on all fours and licks me whenever the other 2 aren’t looking. I can’t wait till I’m big enough to hop on it’s back and go for a ride (big smile). I just farted (big smile). I’m Hungry (big smile).

Oddly, in my mind your voice always sounds exactly like Bruce Willis… It kills me that I miss morning smile time while I’m at work during the week, but it makes the weekend mornings all that much more special.

I may be wrong, but I don’t think babies are supposed to grow talons. Your talon-esque fingernails are sharp enough to slice through an aluminum can. It’s a good thing we put you in a swaddle at night, because I think you’d have a horribly disfigured face otherwise. You still manage to scratch up your cute little face during the day, and your poor mother’s neck looks like Freddy Krueger gave her a shoulder rub. You are impervious to fingernail clippers and nail files, and no matter how many manicures we give you, your wolverine claws stay razor-sharp. I have a feeling it’s going to get a lot worse before it gets better too. As you’re learning to reach out and grab things, just remember that mom’s earrings and dad’s ears are NOT toys.

2 weeks ago you caught your first cold. It broke my heart to see you miserable. Someone needs to invent NyQuil for babies. You’re a tough little man. Even with your nose all stuffed up and gunk all in your chest, you still seemed totally content and mostly happy. The only time it seemed to bother you was when you were trying to fall asleep – It’s hard to suck on a binky when you can’t breathe out of your nose… Oh, and by the way, 1 week ago you passed along that cold to me.

For the first 3 months of your life, your mother and I often tried to make you smile by sticking out our tongues and making a thhhhhpppptttt sound. Usually it worked, but we have unwittingly created a monster. You have now figured out how to stick your tongue out and make the same noise, however, when you do it you launch spit across the room like a fire-hose. It is your absolute favorite thing to do right now. The other night, your mom put you in your crib for your pre-bedtime / post-dinnertime nap (don’t ask), and you spent an entire hour, by yourself, spitting and thhhpppttt-ing to your heart’s delight. We stood outside the door to your room for a good 20 minutes just listening to you and laughing. When we went back into the room, you were SOAKING wet from head to toe. Yuck! I hope you grow out of this phase fast…

The Steeler nation gains a member

Love,
Papa

Dear Asher,

Everyday you learn something new. In the past month you’ve begun to reach out with your hands to grab things… mostly your mother’s hair, my sunglasses, and yes, even my eyebrows (ouch). You’ve also discovered that your hands are a perfect substitution for your binky. You are constantly shoving your tiny fist into your mouth and sucking away with all your might, which makes the loudest slurping noise imaginable. The first time we heard you sucking noisily on your hand, your mother and I looked out the window expecting to see a wild moose eating watermelon. We couldn’t believe such a big sound was coming from such a tiny baby! How can those little lungs of yours create enough suction to make that much noise? Also, I have come to the realization that Baby + Hand + Mouth = 10,000 gallons of DROOL. So, since you’re now a bona fide drool machine, you get to wear a bib at all times. I wish baby drool had some market value so we could put the stuff in 16oz bottles and sell them as a refreshing beverage… then we might actually be able to pay for your college!

Today, on your 3 month birthday, you got to celebrate your first Halloween! We dressed you up in a bumblebee costume and took a bazillion pictures. Your cuteness knows no boundaries. It continues to amaze me every day. I didn’t think it was possible for you to be any cuter and you proved me, oh, so wrong when we zipped you up in that black and yellow striped getup. The real test of cuteness, however, is what other people think (specifically the ones that are NOT of blood relation to you). I’m happy to say that you passed that test with flying colors! The company I work for held a kids Halloween costume photo contest. Your picture took first prize out of the 25+ entries and I got a $15 gift card to Wal-Mart. (which I’ll be using to buy diapers for you!). Now if I can only figure out a way to exploit your cuteness for free Starbucks…

The winning photo!

You’ve finally begun to acknowledge Zoe’s existence, which is a huge relief for her because we all know that the earth revolves around Zoe, not the sun as some brainless scientists believe, but ZOE. The past 3 months have been absolute hell for poor Queen Zoe. She’s tried so hard to get a reaction out of you, and last week, for the first time, you smacked her in the face when she tried to lick you. I don’t think she has any clue about the torment she will one day receive from you… payback’s a bitch… literally…

I’ve been noticing some curious things about the clothes you wear. First of all, why do they make shoes for babies? When you really think about it, it’s just silly. I also don’t get why they put little traction pads on the bottom of onesie feet. Are there really little babies that can stand or walk at 0-3 months? If there are, that’s just creepy. Secondly, what’s with all the damn snaps? Snapping up a wriggling baby after a diaper change should be an Olympic sport. And “C”, why must all baby clothing with hoods be made into some sort of animal head, complete with ears and sometimes eyes and a nose? Granted, there is some initial cuteness associated with this, but the novelty wears out FAST. I have this strange vision of all the baby clothing designers sitting around in a big room laughing about what schmucks parents are for buying their asinine clothes.

Do babies really need robes? No.

My favorite thing about the past month is that you are getting closer and closer to laughing. You’ve got the smiling thing down pat, and you’ve even started making some chuckling sounds, but you haven’t yet put it all together into an honest-to-god real laugh. Before you came along, I always thought parents talking in baby-speak to their kids were idiots… Well, crown me king idiot because I am now a baby-talking fool. I will do ANYTHING to elicit a smile from you. The most effective method entails me jiggling your lips with my index finger while making a “bletha-bletha-bletha-bletha” sound – it’s got about an 85% success rate. I can’t even imagine what kind of stupid and silly things you will get me to do just to make you laugh… I just hope I don’t lose all self-respect.

You are definitely your father’s son. No doubt about it. Several things over the past month have made this abundantly clear. You already love your steaks cooked rare. You agree that Sidney Crosby is the second coming of Mario Lemieux, and, as we’ve recently discovered, you LOVE watching TV. Whenever we turn the TV on, your eyes are instantly transfixed on it (much to your mother’s chagrin). You will spend your entire playtime lying on your play-mat with your neck craned toward the TV like a daisy’s stem to sunlight. This also means that you love watching hockey on the tube with your old man. Awesome.

If Mike Tyson were sleep, you would beat the ever-loving crap out of him. You are a prize-fighter when you step into that ring to battle sleep each night. No matter how tired you are come 8pm, you resist sleep with every ounce of your being. Red eyes… yawns… heavy eyelids… these things are no match for your sleep fighting skillz. Fortunately for us, you always lose by TKO around the 297th round. It’s usually the only time of the day when you are even the least bit fussy, so we don’t mind so much. You’re a great baby!

TKO’d

Love,
Papa

Asher,

So much has happened in the last month!

You are still totally in love with your binky. Sarah and I stay on high alert with the binky close by at all times, just in case you spontaneously jump to def-con 5. As soon as that first sign of sleepiness appears, usually in the form of a yawn-so-cute-it-puts-puppies-to-shame, we jam the binky into your mouth to quell the approaching onslaught of terror. During the day, you usually nap with your binky in, and we’ve thus discovered a major drawback of prolonged binky-use. The plastic rim of the pacifier creates red marks around your lips and makes you look like Bozo the clown. I’ve deemed this phenomenon “funky-binky-baby-clown-face”. I keep expecting to find a multi-colored wig and juggling balls in your crib. (Note to self – Get a picture of you with funky-binky-baby-clown-face for the family album)

Yesterday we took you to see the doctor for your 2 month checkup. You now weigh 11 ½ lbs and stretch out to 23 ¼ inches. Amazingly, the doctor can already tell that you will be over 6ft in height when you finish growing. I hope you get my height, but not my belly! Your weight is in the 50th percentile for babies your age, and your height is in the 75th %. I was also relieved that the circumference of your head is on the smaller side (only in the 25th percentile). I have this strange phobia of kids with enormous heads…they look like an orange on a toothpick. The 2 month exam also means that you got your first round of vaccinations. You took it like a man and barely let out a peep while the nurse injected the shots into your chubby little thighs. The shots gave you a slight fever, but you powered through the next 24 hours without too much fuss. I hope that means you’ll be a pretty tough kid.

Drool quantities are increasing exponentially and I am NOT OK with that. I also have a phobia of baby drool. Yes, I have nightmares of big headed, drooly babies… I need therapy, I know. Our shoulders are now constantly covered in a layer of slime. It could be worse I suppose. The other day you had your first diaper blow-out. Luckily, your grandmother was holding you at the time… I’m hoping the drool phase passes pretty quickly, but I’ve heard it will only get worse when your teeth start coming in. I guess I’ll just have to get over my issues with drool.

Speaking of blow-outs… Under normal circumstances I’m a true believer in the age old adage of Farts = Funny. But, this past weekend you took it to a whole new level… in church. You picked the absolute quietest possible moment to let fly with a blast so loud it’s hard to believe it came from your tiny booty. That’s my boy!

Last month you went to your first hockey game to see dad play. Well, this month we took you to see some real hockey. The Stars held training camp at the rink near our house, so I dragged you and your mother out to watch a practice. We dressed you up in head to toe Pittsburgh Penguins gear since you’re still too little to fit into your Stars stuff. I tried to get our picture taken with a couple of ex-penguin players (Matthew Barnaby & Stu Barnes), but there were a bazillion people there. In January we’ll take you to see Sidney Crosby and the Penguins beat the crap out of the Stars.

Your umbilical cord finally fell off, so now you can actually take a real bath. I think all that time your mom spent in the pool while you were in her tummy paid off. You love the water, and we love giving you baths because you make the funniest faces. We discovered your surprised face when I poured water over your head to wash your hair (or at least what’s left of it – your poor hairline is retreating faster than the French army). Hopefully you won’t be bald for too long!

You’ve also started making pouty faces. The other day I followed your mother around the house with the camera trying to capture your elusive pouty lip in the extended position. It is absolutely the cutest thing I have ever seen in my entire life. I dare say it’s even cuter than your smile. Usually, the pouty lip is an indication that you are indeed upset and about to become oh-so fussy. Thus, the pouty lip is a double edged sword. It is the cutest thing EVER, but it breaks my heart at the same time.

It’s amazing to see how much you change from month to month. You are growing so fast! I can’t imagine what it will be like when you start talking, start walking, and most importantly, start skating… We are going to have so much fun together!

Love,
Papa

Asher,

People have always told me that life really starts to fly by when you have kids, and now I know why… I can’t believe that you’re already 1 month old. It literally feels like we just brought you home from the hospital yesterday. Your first days at our house were an adventure. You got to meet your big sister-pup Zoe and her massive Lickity McLickerson of a tongue, and you had a constant stream of visitors stopping by to give you lots of hugs and kisses. Best of all, we got to spend a lot of time together, just the 3 of us, as a family. That was my favorite time, spending hours and hours just sitting on the couch staring at you and cuddling. You are well on your way to becoming a professional cuddler – just like your mom and dad.

The last month has been a HUGE learning experience for your mother and I (my learning curve being a tad-bit steeper than hers – i.e. Mt. Everest). Despite being thrown into diaper changing duty with very little training and no previous experience, I think I’ve finally mastered the skill. In about 14 years when you’re complaining about having to mow the lawn, I’ll be happy to remind you that you once peed AND pooped all over me and you can either mow the lawn, or let me return the favor. Your choice.

You eat like your dad – loudly, and in mass quantities. Your momma is still getting use to having utters, but we are both thankful that you haven’t had any problems feeding. You now weigh 9 lbs 5 oz which means you are 2 lbs heavier than the day you were born. Every afternoon when I get home from work I swear you’ve grown another inch. It sucks being away from you for 10 hours a day, but we are truly blessed that your mom can stay home with you!

You’ve learned a lot in your first month. Yesterday, mom brought you up to meet me for lunch and you spent the whole time staring at your hands. I think you’re finally starting to figure out that those weird fleshy thingies that continually punch you in the face are actually connected to your body. You’ve also started to smile (much to the delight of your mother and me)! I’ve spent countless hours making silly faces at you in an effort to make you laugh, but so far all you do is look at me as if to say “Dad, you’re a moron”. I can’t wait till you can laugh. We are going to laugh a LOT!

You watched your first Steelers game this past weekend. It was just a pre-season game against Philadelphia, but I made sure you had your Steelers football blanky to cuddle and cheer with. We lost the game, but Big Ben looked good. I told you all about his motorcycle accident and pointed out that if you ever ride one without a helmet you will die because I will kill you! For the next 18 years of your life, we will spend countless hours rotting our brains watching sports – Penguins, Stars, Steelers, Cowboys, Mavericks, and golf. It’s mostly heart-ache and frustration, but those moments of ultimate victory more than make up for it. You also went to your first hockey games with your momma to watch me play, and I’ve been scouring the hockey shops around town looking for the smallest hockey skates I can find.

You’ve developed a slightly disturbing addiction to your pacifier (which we call your binky). When you get really tired, you like to suck on your binky until you fall asleep. Sometimes it falls out before you nod off and you let out screams of agony while shaking like a heroin addict going through withdrawal. It breaks my heart to hear you cry.

You absolutely love to be swaddled. We call you “the amazing baby burrito.” In the last week you’ve figured out how to wiggle out of a regular blanky swaddle, so now we only use a special blanket made specifically for swaddling that closely resembles a straight-jacket. All it lacks is the buckles, but you love it. It gives your face a much needed break from the torture of your uncontrollably flailing arms. You like to suck on your thumb, and you always get such a surprised look on your face when it happens to land in your mouth, as if you had nothing to do with it. I am VERY thankful that you are not a drooly baby, and so far you haven’t had any major spit-up incidents. You seem to have a good handle on which end stuff is supposed to go into and which end that same stuff goes out…

One of the best things about having you around is getting to see your mom so happy. She loves you so much she glows. Being a mom is what she was built to do. You are the luckiest kid in the world to have her as a mom. Always remember that!

It makes me a little sad that you’re getting so big so fast. A part of me wishes that you would stay this size forever, but the rest of me knows that the best is yet to come. Your mother and I are so happy and blessed to have you!

Love,
Papa