Dear Asher,

Happy Birthday!

I’m absolutely amazed at how much my attitude towards kids has changed in the last 21 months. I used to be THAT guy when it came to kids… You know, the extremely awkward fellow that is scared to death to hold babies. The guy that sees kids as little, snotty, drool covered monsters. Honestly, 99% of the time I never even noticed kids at restaurants or malls unless they were misbehaving. After your mother and I found out we were having you, my eyes were opened to a whole new world. All of the sudden there were cute little snuggly, playful kiddies everywhere! Things that used to annoy the hell out of me now make me smile. I’m so thankful that I’m not THAT guy anymore, and it’s all because of you…

You have several new teeth poking through this month, but, unfortunately you are suffering from a phenomenon that I commonly refer to as ‘Sharkteeth.’ Sharkteeth is a gruesome affliction most commonly found in toddlers, but in some instances it can also be found in fully-grown-adult peoples (i.e. – see Mary Lynn Rajskub). A sharktoothed person can be easily identified by the presence of extremely uneven, half-developed teeth that can be stubby or sharp, and in some of the more hideous cases, both. In the past, I have had severe allergic reactions when spotting sharktoothed individuals, most of the time resulting in facial contortions and vocal outburst of “uggghhhhhh, shhhhhhharkteeth.” Thanks to you, I can now proudly say that I no longer see Sharkteeth as a grotesque affliction. I now view children that have Sharkteeth as cute, lovable, adorable, and precious…. (Although, I still find it disturbing in adults)

Sharkteeth

What an awesome month you’ve had! Our little baby is gone, and in his place is this walking, talking little dude. A few of your favorite words are: mama, papa, up, Zoe, ball, and whoa. You love to say ‘tickle tickle’ in the cutest little baby-speak when I tickle your feet. Your all time favorite word so far is ‘no-no’. You always utter it right before you do something you know you’re not supposed to do. It’s like having my own personal Asher alarm system… All I have to do is listen for the ‘no-no’ and I’m alerted that you’re about to get into something off-limits. It’s also crazy how many words you understand even though you can’t say them. I guess I should start watching what I say around you.

Earmuffs!

I hate to have to tell you this, but you walk like a drunken monkey… of course you’ve only had about 3 weeks of practice, so who can blame you? With each day that passes, you are getting more stable and more confident on your feet. Fear is not a factor for you – there is no trepidation in your footsteps. If there was such a thing as a stunt-baby, you would have your own TV show co-starring Lee Majors. Your mother and I are so used to you bumping into things and falling over backwards that we hardly even notice it anymore. It takes a pretty good crash to make you cry, but even then it’s only a matter of seconds before you’re back up, rumbling and stumbling along like a little freight train. I hope you are as fearless on skates as you are on foot!

While editing one of the 4,095,059,334 pictures that we take of you every month, your mom and I noticed that your hair was getting a little out of control… So, we took you to the kiddie haircut place to get your baby-mullet chopped off. We were pretty apprehensive about it because we didn’t want your hair to look butchered for your first birthday party. Luckily, our apprehension was unfounded and the cartoon-ish establishment we took you to did a great job! You took it like a man!

Out of control hair

Your first birthday party was a smashing success! We squeezed about 42 people (adults and kids) into our tiny house to celebrate your big day. There was a mini bounce-house in the back yard as well as a little splash-pool for you and the rest of the kiddos to play in. We even set up a knee hockey rink in our bedroom, but I think the adults used it more than the kids (the rink was a great early birthday gift to you from an old friend of your mom and I). You loved your little ‘smasher’ cake and made a huge mess while devouring it. You also got a TON of new toys, although I think you like the boxes they came in more than the actual toys. I’m afraid we might have set the bar a little too high with this first party… I don’t have a clue how we’re ever going to top it! It was a great day, and a good time was had by all.

Fun to be One!

I can’t believe it’s been a year since you were born. It’s the strangest thing, because in some ways it seems like a lifetime ago, but in other ways it seems like just yesterday. Being a dad is the most challenging thing I’ve ever done, but it’s also the most rewarding thing I’ve ever done.

Love,
Papa